climbing and life.

ah man, last night i woke up every hour. why? because i climbed this 10b yesterday up AF Canyon and now it's haunting me. it's all pretty much an overhang, with 5 bolts and then the anchors. i got to the fifth bolt and could not flipping get to the anchors. after falling 10+ feet each attempt my arms were shot and i had major sewing machine legs. luckily a guy was coming up the route to my right and said he could clean my last quick draw if i couldn't get to the anchor. soooo, it didn't finish. gah, that is always the most frustrating thing. and now i can't get it out of my head, i need to finish it. i MUST finish that climb. why must i be so weak in the arms? WHY?! i miss those two months when Carrie and i were at the climbing gym three or four times a week. i miss a lot of things these days.

life is weird. i've decided to plan to not make plans and just trust that the Lord knows what His plan for me is. i'm just about the most indecisive person and my plans are always changing. but one thing is always for sure, i always know that things will work out. i always have this peaceful feeling when i do finally make a choice. i get caught up in making the choice, thinking that one is better than the other for my life right now, but truthfully whatever choice i make i know that it'll all work out as long as i'm making GOOD choices along the way.

now, i'm going to preach a little more about climbing. when i was on this 10b yesterday, i was on that face for prob 20+ minutes. just planning my next move, resting, planning, mapping it out so i could throw what little energy i had left into making the next move. when i was laying in bed last night i kept thinking about the climb and how badly i wanted to finish it and get that last move. and then i thought, hey, every night for the last week i've layed in bed thinking about my next move in life and where to take myself in this world and how to get there. climbing is like life. sometimes it takes a whole lot to get to the next step, and other times it really doesn't take much at all. other times you can't quite get that last move (like me, yesterday), just like in life. buuuut, you keep coming back and trying (like my twenty-five attempts to reach the top followed by twenty-five falls) or you find that a different move or route suits you much better than the initial one. i will get that climb one day though. i know it.

this is so cheesy. whatever though. all in all, life is weird. and things don't happen like you plan, but it always works out for the best if you put your trust in the Lord and make an effort to involve him in every step you take. 

and i love rock climbing. 

the end.